Anger In 3’s and The Way Out
There are three variants of anger. One: end of the nose. That anger that erupts in the moment, like when you're cut off on the highway. Two: resentment. The rehashing of that anger throughout the day, week or month; about that car that cut you off on the highway. Three: contempt. A way of life that keeps you raging at every car that might cut you off on the highway. All three stem from the same point of violation, but only resentment and contempt need you and your willingness to pick up the torch and consciously keep that anger alive. Anger does have it’s place and frankly the world needs a bit of it to consciously right a wrong or draw attention to an injustice. But anger isn't the emotion that needs to go the distance. Anger as a way of life will keep you lonely, setup and away from the love of self, community and the Divine. How does one keep a safe distance from resentment and contempt? You need words, community, accountability and Divine love. We look squarely at the past with our mentors, friends and family WITHOUT the cause of vengeance or retribution. We allow mentors to shave the sharp edges of the anger while pointing out our place and responsibility in the resentments and contemptuous circumstances. We invite God into the hurt and pain, asking for freedom from the oppression that keeps us bound to anger. We come to see resentment and contempt as a nasty protection mechanism that is designed to keep us isolated and alone.
The way out:
1. Speak, write, communicate your resentment and contempt (what people, places or things do you hold anger/resentment or contempt for).
2. Find accountability/community with your anger. Talk, talk, talk with a mentor, friend, spiritual director, spouse (Where did it come from, how did you play a role in the anger, how did fear play a role in the anger).
3. Pray for freedom from the anger. Pray for the people, places and things you are angry with.
Need help with anger? Call or text J.R. at 619.964.0337 / @jrmahon
Are you interested in spiritual direction? Here’s how to get started.
Step 1. Schedule a complimentary, no-obligation consult. Do that here.
Step 2. Watch your email for questions from me. Before we hop on the phone, I’d like to know a bit about you and what you’d like to get out of spiritual direction or coaching with me.
Step 3. Hit “reply” to that email and answer the questions.
Step 4. At the scheduled time of your consult, we’ll talk! We’ll use the opportunity to make sure we’re the perfect fit.
Step 5. Then we’ll get started! If you decide to work with me, I’ll tell you the exact steps for getting started. If you decide not to work with me or if we aren’t a perfect fit, I’m happy to share other resources to help you get what you need.
Have questions? You can call me… 619.964.0337
