Facing Truth
There are times in life when facing the truth is hard. Being honest with ourselves can be one of the hardest things to do and can cause us to feel out of control. But the truth is there, whether we acknowledge it or not. Happy faces on social media cannot mask what is really behind the complicated, emotional, relational existence of our everyday lives. We all have problems and challenges. If we want to find true peace, sometimes we will need to face a harsh reality head on, be honest with ourselves and see things for what they really are. Pretending that everything is fine or that there aren't any problems only causes us more pain down the road.
Truth can be hard for us to face.
There’s a myriad of ways to avoid the truth. We blame others. We live in denial of what is really going on. We completely turn a blind eye. Sometimes, as in the case of addiction, we just don’t want to change our lifestyle. We would rather continue living in the comfort of the familiar. In the case of divorce, we might worry about what it would mean financially. When kids are involved, the lives it affects, and the stakes are much higher. We’re unwilling to upset things in such a way that our world will crumble in order to be put back together in a stronger, healthier existence. It takes incredible strength to not only face the truth but live out the truth.
We all want to believe that we're good people and that everything is fine. Sometimes it's easier to ignore what we know deep down in our hearts than it is to accept the painful reality that sometimes we aren't as good, or our relationships aren’t as good, as we'd like to think. This can play out in addictions, abuse (not just physical), infidelity, broken trust, or abandonment. You may be the one suffering the effects of someone you’re in relationship with or you may be the one causing them. Either way, it is hard for people to face the reality of the mess and take action to stop the cycle.
There are several reasons why it’s important to face the truth:
It’s painful. It can be scary to realize that something you believed in doesn’t exist, or that someone isn’t who you thought they were. But the pain of facing reality is often less than the pain of continuing with a false belief.
The truth sets you free from fear and worry. You can’t change what has happened in the past, but you can learn from it and move forward. By facing the truth about yourself, others, and the world, you obtain knowledge that empowers you to make better decisions for yourself.
You will draw closer to God. It’s a well-known Scripture, John 8:32, “the truth will set you free.” Truth comes from God and can heal and nourish your heart in such a way that gives you freedom to experience your true self.
Sometimes you need someone else—a friend, family member, or even better, a spiritual director—to help you see things as clearly as possible so that you can take steps toward making positive changes in your life.
Don’t be afraid to face the truth and see things for what they are.
When we are in denial about our reality, our healing will be delayed. This means that if your partner has been cheating on you for months and you choose not to acknowledge or accept this fact—that’s going to mean even more work for yourself down the road. So, think of facing the truth like ripping off a band-aid. You need to rip it off quickly to expose the gashing wound of what is real so you can get on to healing faster.
Think about your life for a moment. Chances are some mistakes you made were repeated multiple times because they were not faced or resolved. You could say that these habits kept “tattooing” themselves onto your mind and body until they became permanent fixtures in who you are as a person.
The best way to become aware of these harmful repetitive behaviors is by facing them head on with honesty and openness (and often courage). If you keep hiding behind distractions or blaming others for your problems instead of taking responsibility for yourself and your actions, it will be hard to move forward towards true self-awareness and acceptance.
It’s important also to connect spiritually with the Divine. You can do this through prayer, meditation and stillness. Sit with yourself and contemplate your circumstances. A wonderful way to uncover, or discover, truths is to sit with a spiritual director, like J.R. Mahon, who can help you connect with God.
Sometimes your greatest strength is being vulnerable enough to expose the truth for what it really is.
When we’re in pain and hurting, we can be tempted to hide from the world. You may feel shame or embarrassment and worry about what others will think. This is understandable—it is hard to be vulnerable! But if you want to heal, sometimes it’s best to let things be out in the open. Why? Because you really don't have to do this alone! You can ask friends or family members for help if you need it; you might be surprised at the people who will support you.
Don’t’ let the pain of facing a hard truth keep you from seeing it clearly.
We all have our own challenges and weaknesses, but if we can face them head on, we will have a much better chance of overcoming them. The next time you find yourself in denial about something in your life or someone else's life, consider this fact: facing the truth can be like ripping off a band-aid — painful but necessary if you want to heal and find peace.
If you need to talk to someone, J.R. is available for sessions immediately. NO waiting list or long wait time for an appointment. You can schedule a time by calling or texting him at 619-964-0337.
Diane is the Director of Development for TableTop Ministries. Diane and her husband J.R. have been married 28 years and raise three kids adopted from foster care. They live in Northeast Ohio where they run TableTop and The Retreat at Ridgewood. Follow @theretreatatridgewood on Instagram to see Diane’s day to day happenings and feel free to contact her at dimahon67@gmail.com.
